Everything is Just Fine

21 Sep

For the last 12 years I feel like I have been struggling to be heard. It is the most basic of emotional needs – the need to be heard. To be able to say “this is who I am” and for someone to truly hear what you are saying. In relationships there is an element of trust where you ask the other person, above all others, to be the person that answers back every time you say “this is who I am” with “yes you are and I love you for it”. And when that doesn’t happen  most people will acknowledge a lack of emotional support and choose to end the relationship. Unfortunately, low self-esteem and emotional naivety a die-hard positive attitude saw me trying harder and harder to get my “yes you are and I love you for it” response. Truth be told, until this week, I was still looking for that response.

There is nothing harder than standing up and saying look at me, I am a nice person. I am good and kind and caring. And have someone turn around and slap you back down. But, I am learning to stand my ground. I am learning that if I believe in myself, I can’t get knocked down. That you can only be knocked down if you allow it.

I am so grateful to have learned that lesson. Grateful to the person who taught me that lesson. Grafeful to the people in my life over the last 3 years (all of them) who have answered me back with “yes you are and I love you for it”.

I know who I am now and I am okay with the fact that some people will never see it. I am happy to move on and fill my life with love, joy and vibrance.

 


 

 

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4 Responses to “Everything is Just Fine”

  1. Susan September 21, 2011 at 10:29 am #

    Yes you are and I love you for it XXX

  2. Cazpi September 21, 2011 at 1:25 pm #

    Yes you are. And we luff you. The end.

  3. St September 22, 2011 at 7:59 am #

    Dearest Pia, you unknowingly wrote these words for me, it is exactly the space I’m in right now! Like looking into a mirror! And made me feel that I’m not alone 🙂 Thank you xxxx

  4. Heather September 22, 2011 at 12:10 pm #

    Yes you are and i love you for it too!

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