De Ja Vu

4 Feb

In a stunning sequel to yesterday’s worst-day-in-the-world production, may I present my day so far:

  • wake up after passing out at 8:45 last night from sheer, mind-numbing exhaustion
  • squint at the clock. realise that the maid must have left it unplugged
  • don’t worry about the time, because the bed is just so warm and nice and snuggly
  • ignore various “mummy’s” from Adam’s room until they get more demanding (about 5 seconds later)
  • stumble out of bed
  • squint at the clock in the kitchen and realise that it is already 7:30 and that you are on a fast track to being very, very late
  • frantically fill up the kettle to provide required jolt of caffeine
  • realise kettle is not switched on
  • switch kettle on
  • realise kettle switch is already in “on” position
  • realise that you forgot to recharge electricity last night before passing out
  • simultaneously register the following (1) you now have no internet access, so you cannot recharge online  (2) your phone has been beeping all night on low power and probably has about 3 seconds of life left (3) you have no electricity with which to charge phone (4) you have to pick up Jaimie to take her to school (5) it is already very, very late
  • frantically call your mother to get her to access your bank account online to buy pre-paid electricity. (note: you need to do this before your cell phone’s power runs out as they send an access pin number to your phone that allows you to log on)
  • hear cell phone’s warning beep
  • no answer from said mother
  • hear cell phone’s warning beep
  • Say swear word out loud –  as it is nearly 8:00 and she should be at work by now. Phone repeatedly hoping she will answer.
  • realise she is not going to answer
  • Curse
  • hear cell phone’s warning beep
  • curse, curse, curse
  • realise that all friends/neighbours have either left for work (as it is now after 8:00) or are away for the week
  • Curse them all
  • make Adam’s porridge and tea on the stove (thank heaven for gas). Still no caffeine for me. Can you say frazzzzle…
  • take a shower with Adam SCREAMING…. “mommy out” “mommy out” “mommy open door” “OPEN” ” mommy OUT!” “OPEN!!!!” the entire time (or some variation thereof)
  • wash hair while trying to keep the shower door closed with Adam on the other side trying to open it
  • realise it is already 8:15
  • calm down snotting, sobbing, emotionally overwrought child
  • try and figure out how you are going to get dressed, pack bags, pick up Jaimie, buy electricity, put electricity into metre, drop kids off at school and get to work by 9:00
  • frazzzzzllllle….
  • pack Adam’s bag, pack your bag, dress Adam, dress yourself, drag the whole lot out and dump into car as quickly as possible
  • notice out of the corner of your eye, your neighbour Erica and kid leaving house. Think that this is strange as school started at 8:00. Figure they must be having a bad morning too. Something in the water? The moon? Mars aligning with Jupiter? Figure it must be something like that
  • Get in the car, just as you are about to burn rubber outta there, it register that the clock says 7:30
  • not 8:30
  • 7:30
  • all packed and dressed with nowhere to go
  • 7:30
  • bang your head repeatedly against the steering wheel

And then, in a glorious encore to the morning…

  • first petrol station – “sorry, electricity offline”
  • second petrol station – “sorry, electricity offline”
  • curse, curse, curse

I should’ve just stayed in bed.

Luckily I bank with a most fantastic bank. In the recesses of my brain, I heard “how can we help you” and remembered that you can buy pre-paid electricity at any FNB ATM.

Glory be to FNB.

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6 Responses to “De Ja Vu”

  1. JavaQueen February 4, 2009 at 9:52 am #

    Oh, this sounds like a FRAZZLED day indeed. I just hate these moments when it seems the universe is against me! GAH! Glad it worked out. It’s interesting to read how you acquire your electricity, kinda “pay as you go” for it? Seems stressful. Give that little boy of yours a big hug and kiss- it’s a great cure-all! Love Love xoxoxoxo

  2. sleepyjane February 4, 2009 at 10:15 am #

    Oh no Pia!! It’s only 10 am thought so hopefully the day gets better! 🙂

  3. Susan February 4, 2009 at 11:51 am #

    That’s so funny. I hope that the rest of your day’s been better!! You’ll laugh about it later over a glass of wine, but I can just imagine how mad you were… XXX

  4. odette February 4, 2009 at 1:47 pm #

    i didn’t know electricity connection can be prepaid too. that is really cool, except on days when you forget…and on days like you just had…. 😀

    i think i’m going to get us another digital clock, because i once rushed to the bus stop without brushing my hair afraid to miss my bus, only to wait in the cold for a long time because i didn’t see the time well from our kitchen clock! grrrrrr

  5. veronica February 4, 2009 at 5:48 pm #

    LOL omg what a morning! I only hope the day got better. But, I just want to say three quick things::

    1. I LIVE AROUND THE EFFING CORNER!!!!!!
    2. I HAVE INTERNET!!!!!!
    3. YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED ME!!!!!

    ok bye.. love you
    xx

  6. Suzaan February 4, 2009 at 7:05 pm #

    Now this was a funny post, only when it is not happening to me, you shoulda phoned Ronnie now you know for next time

    xxx

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